In honor of the 12/21 Mayan Apocalypse I give you Zombies vs… a Five week series on the walking dead among us. This series will bring to light the struggle happening in this world between the “Zombies” among us: those walking dead hungry only for the flesh of the living, and the everyday people they would love to snack on.
The Zombies are swarming around your happy home. They want to get inside, eat all the people, and make a general mess of things. You can’t let the zombies in. They make terrible guests, they ruin everything they touch, and you’ll be left cleaning the mess.
You can build whatever barricade you want; Zombies always find a way in. Like anything else in this world, you cannot shelter yourself or your family completely from the world, which is clamoring outside your doors and windows. Even if you seal off every entrance and Zombie gateway, there is always the chance that somebody inside begins to “turn” before anyone realizes it. Here Are a few ways to keep the zombies out:
Don’t walk like a zombie. Zombies shuffle around, without any real sense of direction except what will enable them to survive. A zombie is at the core a consumer, who gives no real benefit to society. Don’t go through life as a simple consumer. Be a contributor. Do things for the benefit of other people. Consider something other than simply what you want. Don’t walk like a Zombie.
Don’t talk like a Zombie. OK, we’re reaching here. But Zombies are famous for a monotone groan and hiss with a few chomps of their teeth mixed in for effect. We all know the negative impact of a depressing “woe is me” type person on everyone around them… especially their own family. Life will deal you some crappy circumstances to be sure, and in those seasons you may feel more like a zombie than a Grade A choice cut of human being. But remember that is a season, and season’s change. Keep your chin up, stand up straight, and remember: you don’t have to be a zombie. Zombies are full of doom, gloom, fear, and self-pity. You may be “full of it” but you don’t have to be full of that. Don’t talk like a Zombie.
Don’t bite like a Zombie. Zombies are indiscriminately bite happy. They are totally Equal Opportunity when it comes to who they size up as their next midnight snack. Traffic may have been bad. Work may be a depressing place. The bills may have all arrived in your mailbox on the same day. The snow plow may have removed half of your front lawn (that was for you northerners). It doesn’t mean it is time to bite your spouse for saying “how was your day?” Don’t bite like a Zombie, for three reasons. The first is that bites are contagious. You start biting, and before you know it, others are biting too. Second, it says something about you as a person. Nothing screams “I am a rotting, lifeless, Zombie” like seeing a person go on a biting spree with their words and actions towards others. There are few things I hate more than hearing someone talk poorly about their own family. And finally, if you bite like a Zombie, you get treated like one. If you’re going to go about biting people indiscriminately, someone is going to go all Rick Grimes on you before long. For those of you respectable folk who don’t watch Zombie flicks, that means you can expect a quick and sudden smackdown of some sort sooner than later. Don’t bite like a Zombie.
The Zombies are swarming around your happy home. They want to get inside, eat all the people, and make a general mess of things. You can’t let the zombies in. They make terrible guests, they ruin everything they touch, and you’ll be left cleaning the mess.