When Nobody “Likes” You


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It’s rough when nobody “likes” you. Not in the friendship and personal relationships with others sense though… that isn’t what I mean. My blog lost a bunch of “likes” recently. Que the violins…

Our website had some technical issues recently that caused me to look more closely at how it was working (or wasn’t). While looking closely at some previous blog posts, I realized that a few of the more widely circulated posts that previously had several hundred Facebook “Likes” had suddenly reset to zero. In fact, it appears as if all the blog posts that had more than 100 Facebook “likes” have all somehow reset their vote count. I know, big deal, right?

My first thought was “Man, those were my best posts. The ones about my family, and about my daughter’s surgery, or the move back to Dallas…” But that is too shallow a mindset for me to embrace so I started looking for some takeaways… And I began to realize that there are some deeper lessons here than how Facebook stores and resets data. Here is what came to mind…

You Won’t Always Get Credit For The Good Stuff. I’m not Jon Acuff, Ed Stetzer, Mark Driscoll, or Pete Briscoe. Those folks can tweet about the weather and 4,000 people will look for a spiritual application to “68 degrees and cloudy.” So when I do something that a few hundred people notice, it is a big deal. And of course, now none of those “big deal” blog posts look as impressive anymore now that they have zero likes. Same content, and same meaning, but no more recognition. The takeaway? In life, I have to accept that I won’t always get credit for things I do. In fact, I guarantee none of the random folks who recently had ice on their windshields will ever know I scraped it off for them the other day.  The lesson is to do what I do as a reflection of Christ living through me, not for the possibility of people thinking I am amazing.

Some Folks Really Need To Be “Liked” …and it can be uncomfortable to be around them. Insecurity is a dangerous thing when it comes to leaders, especially for those they work alongside. Insecure leaders tend to either loathe themselves or grow bitter towards their perceived “rivals” in leadership. It sounds petty (because it is), yet it is a real part of life and leadership. My advice is to trust God with your present and future, and look to build others up while you avoid being consumed with being seen as better than others. I’ve been around guys like this; they’re often emotional black holes and feed on the joy of others, reflecting nothing back. Seriously: step back and evaluate whether you are deliberately making someone look bad right now in retaliation for the simple fact that you have low self esteem and they look like they might have something you desperately want. I know this can be hard to hear for some…

Ministry Is Not A Competition How else can I say this? This ISN’T ABOUT YOU!…at least not in the eyes of God. Pursue where God is leading you, do not fight for what others have and therefore you want. Dream big and aim to do what God intended you to do, and don’t get sidetracked by things that you believe make you feel important and look impressive. It takes a much stronger person to step out in faith than it does to get ahead in your own strength. There are few more selfish mindsets than one that seeks to elevate ones self above another believer in Christ for “opportunities” in ministry. Don’t follow the example of those you know you shouldn’t. Don’t slander someone because they’re a “threat” to you. You might find yourself fighting against the will of God in that person’s life. Good luck.

It’s Only Facebook. Here’s where I circle back around. In my case, I lost Facebook “likes” on my blog. But really, so what? Facebook is a great tool to connect with people and inspire others (and post pictures of your family so your parents can see their grandkids). But as great as Facebook and other social media sites are as communication vehicles, don’t get carried away. I don’t think for a second that folks who abstain from Social Media really have much of a voice in our present culture, let’s just be clear. But “having a voice” is never going to be on par with having character. And if your need to get credit, to be liked, to convince others that you’re special… it’s time to step back and ask God to refine your heart so that you will love Him more fully and hate others less.

Think I’m being too serious? Well, lighten up. It’s only a blog…


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